One Time I Heard This Guy Say… Life’s Clichés and Poker Tips – Good “Cents” Applies to Us All!
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Hey Fellow players, I’m back. The folks at PTP asked me to work on some of the top poker tips and relay that information to our readership. “No problem,” I told my boss, “I’ll just jump on the net and get right on that.” and fired up the old computer. My next though was, “Uh-oh.”
I glanced over and saw the little information bar that informed me I was looking at items 1-10 of about 5,150,000 hits for “poker tips,” that took Google a whopping eight one hundredth’s of a second to generate. “Hmm,” I said to myself, “I have a feeling this could a pretty popular subject.” Once again, it appears I jumped off the diving board without looking down first (I hate when I do that) but the important part is to give it my best shot to scribble a little something that will be of help. Especially considering that the regular readership of PTP includes some of the finest poker players in the world today. That’s not a suck-up either folks, that is a fact. You can trust me on this; I’m a poker player.
Sifting through some five million poker tips has been a bit wearisome, but also led to some rather surprising observations. Though there are a number of very specific tips that apply to certain hands, situation or games, many of these are at a highly expert level and would best dealt with on a per question basis. Most of these tips are far more general and by far the largest category is basically poker adaptation of some of the most popular of “Life’s” clichés.
So, for this week, I will start out with some of the most popular and recurrent themes and we’ll get a little more specific as needed, ok?
Breath through your nose . . . that way you’ll keep your mouth shut more.
Nowhere is it more important to watch exactly what and when you say something (or the reverse) than at a poker table. Expert and professional level players are always watching and listening to everything any player says or does at the table. Not only are they listening to what you say, but even more important, I how you say it. By limiting your poker vocabulary to “check, raise, call or fold,” you eliminate a wide variety to “tells” you probably don’t even know you have.
Another advantage of refraining from the Chatty-Kathy Syndrome is that many of the new generation of poker players, are just now venturing from on-line gaming to live play. On-line, when one player is at his computer somewhere on the other side of the planet, many of this “new breed” seem to delight in such conversational gambits like, “Hey, u !!*&^(&$#$ moron! U play like a *&^*%^-ing *&*$%$-hole so go *^&^$# urseff and take a (*^*^%$&%$# hike!” Despite being grammatically atrocious and socially unacceptable, there is a vast difference in typing this little expression of love and admiration into a dialogue box for a “chat” function, and telling that to the 6’4” 270 pound ex-Airborne Ranger logger or steelworker quietly playing ninth base. At best, you could hope the casino or card-room personnel would intervene with a warning, yet at worst, well…use your imagination.
So being quiet while playing poker is not only potentially much healthier, it is also strategically a great device to keep your “tells” limited. Or as they say in the business world so often, it’s a win-win situation.
All Good Things Come To Those Who Wait
Another time-honored cliché that seems like it was designed for poker players. As I’m sure you’ve already figured out, this all boils down to patience. Since casinos make their money in the poker room by dealing as many hands as they can and absorbing the rake, you will have the opportunity to play about a gazillion hands a night. But are they the right ones.
Somebody told me once that before the flop all hands are equal. I guess this makes sense in a weird sort of way, but it has been my experience that top-end premium hands are a bit more than “equal.” It might take you 50 hands in a row before you catch a high pocket pair, high suited connectors or top end off suit connectors. Trust me, it’s worth the wait.
This doesn’t mean after tossing your 375th hand and finally catching AA, KK or Big Slick is necessarily going to win that particular hand, but over the long haul, those are the hands that will win more than they lose. If you get bored too easily, go take a few minutes at chainsaw juggling or something and then come back for a while, but when you DO come back, be prepared to wait. Your monster hands AND nuts flops will come eventually.
You Cannot Win If You Do Not Play
Okay, you’ve learned to wait for your chance, and now 26 years later, you’re on the button and catch wired Aces. The raises were maxed before they even got to you and the flop comes A7A. You can try trapping, or slow-playing your hand, but unless a runner, runner straight flush possibility comes up you are more than likely going to smash the pot. So play!!!
Either way, slow-playing or ramming the pot could cost you a few callers, but if they were all raising like crazy pre-flop, you’ve probably got the hook set deep enough to rake them all in anyway, so go for it. Be aggressive. Even if you’ve been playing tighter than a rusted set of pliers, there will almost always be a few wannabe sheriff’s who will call you just to try and bust you bluffing. Nobody’s ever won a tournament playing scared.
Doing Stupid Things Is Just A Way Of Making Life Interesting
I know this sounds terrible, but I am not talking about turning into a raising station no matter what your hand is. As a rule, be patient and wait for the premium hands and flops.
However, once in a while, if its not going to be too expensive, do something crazy. Run an obvious bluff on them, and when you do get busted by the aforementioned wannabe sheriff, show your hand. Lay it down with authority! Then look surprised that somebody was brilliant enough to figure it out.
Now, you’ve accomplished two things. First, you’ve put a bit of doubt in the minds of the players who thought they had you read like a book, and secondly, you have increased the number of collateral callers who think you just might be on tilt. You can only do this once in a great while though. Otherwise it gets too costly.
An Ounce Of Prevention Is Worth A Pound of Cure
One aspect of poker many people don’t pay much attention to is intuition. Listen to your heart. Listen to that little voice that says, “Watch out, something bad is gonna happen…” If everything looks just perfect, but for some reason it just doesn’t feel right, slow down. They don’t call the river card “The Heartbreaker” without good reason.
You can slow stuff up with a check, a cold call or even a fold if that feeling is strong enough, but I think you’ll find as you go along that your “inner child” won’t steer you wrong too often. Not winning a huge pot is altogether different from losing a huge pot, and I’d like you to really think about the following paragraph for a moment:
How many times have you been driving down the road in a big hurry when all of the sudden, for no explicable reason you just know there’s a patrol car around the next corner with his radar out, and you slowed down, only to get around that corner and bing-bam-zowie, there he is, radar and all. Of course, you did cost yourself a few minutes but you saved yourself a few hundred dollars.
Well, that’s it peoples! I hope this is helpful, and I will write more soon. I will be working on some more specific tips very soon, and as always if you have a great tip let us all know. There’s no such thing as too many winners!
Respects,
Vinny
