PokerStars adds rabid howler monkey to team of sponsored pros
Shawn Perry
THE INTERNET — In a move that has drawn sharply divided reactions from the online poker community, popular online poker room PokerStars announced this week that they have added a rabid howler monkey to Team PokerStars, the room’s roster of sponsored pros.
PPA Hires Phil Ivey to Stare at Congressmen
Chris Grove
WASHINGTON D.C. - Leading online poker lobbying group The Poker Player’s Alliance (PPA) announced today a sharp turn in their lobbying tactics - the hiring of Phil Ivey for the exclusive purpose of staring at Congressmen who are opposed to online poker regulation.
Michael Bolcerek, president of the PPA, explained the decision. “We thought we were on the right track, what with raising money and hiring insiders like (PPA Chairman) Alfonse D’Amato. And, don’t get me wrong,” Bolcerek continued, “those were all good steps. But then I saw one of those Full Tilt ads where Ivey’s just staring you down and I thought, now there’s a guy who can make you crap your pants with a single glare.”
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Hot Girl From Poker Room Not Nearly as Hot in Wal-Mart
LOUISVILLE, KY - Poker room regulars at Caesar’s Indiana reacted with a blend of outrage, disbelief and sadness to the claim, made by poker dealer Steve Partusi, that the super-hot girl who often plays 4/8 limit on the weekends is, in fact, not very hot …full article
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Obese Guy Clearly Has Personal Stake in ‘Poker as Sport’ Debate
LOUISVILLE, KY - Following a casual bar argument over the proper label for poker - sport or game - almost all participants, regardless of their initial opinion, were able to agree on one thing: an extremely obese man at the bar was taking the whole …full article
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New Poker Site Offers Deposit Bonus: 100% up to Free Baby
THE INTERNET: In yet another raising of the bar for both the costliness and uniqueness of online poker promotions, a new poker site - pokerbaby.com - has announced one of the most lucrative and controversial offers to date: a 100% matching deposit bonus up to …full article
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Dumbass Launches New Online Poker Room
THE INTERNET - Online gaming industry sources revealed last Tuesday that, despite overwhelming odds against any realistic hope of even the most marginal form of success, yet another dumbass decided to launch an online poker room.
“Looks like another moron hopped a one way train …full article
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