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Fox Announces Plans for “Low Stakes Poker”

LOS ANGELES, CA – With Game Show Network’s “High Stakes Poker” continuing to gather momentum in viewership, the Fox Network is attempting to capitalize by completing filming on a poker show they think will better relate to the general populace. The network that brought such thrill rides as “Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire” and “My Big, Fat, Obnoxious Fiancé” threw its hat in the televised poker ring with their new show “Low Stakes Poker.”

“Let’s face it: Times are tough. Do people really want to see people really want to see people gamble stacks of money so large that they can buy the entire state of Michigan and still have enough left over for Arkansas?” said Fox President, Kevin Reilly. “We at Fox do not indulge in that kind of decadence.”

“Low Stakes Poker” does deviate in several key ways from its predecessor. For instance, HSP has blinds of $400 and $800 with a $200 ante. LSP has blinds of 2 cents and 4 cents. HSP was played in a closed off and decorated room in the Golden Nugget Casino. LSP was played on an air hockey table in the arcade of Circus Circus. Both shows do offer players who use cash in lieu of chips as part of their stack. HSP has many players who have bundles of hundred dollar bills, LSP has players with rolls of nickels.

The all-star field was released and includes play money no-limit legend ffedor, that guy who won the Hubble Freeroll that one time, and Phil Hellmuth. Joe Buck and Layne Flack will provide the commentary.

“Low Stakes Poker provides a cornucopia of human emotion. A veritable buffet, as it were. You see the big limit players nonchalant about quarter million dollar pots, oblivious to the fact that they’re gambling small fortunes for regular people,” said Buck, “You don’t have that here. Every ten dollar all in is a matter of life or death to these people.”

Added Flack, “Yeah!”, before attempting, unsuccessfully, to high-five Buck.

Previews made available to the media did offer some fantastic hands including a player losing a preflop all-in when his pocket 4s were outdrawn by an offsuit king and jack for $18. After lambasting the player for calling his all in with king high, he declared to the table that “this is chump change” and that he “makes more money in 6 minutes than they do in 6 lifetimes”.

Cameras then followed the man as he hurried to the nearest Dance Dance Revolution game where he begged a twelve year-old for his remaining quarters, promising to pay him back ten dollars the next day.

Despite the meager stakes, Hellmuth reportedly somehow managed to drop nearly $350,000 before storming out in a huff in the middle of Episode 2.

“Low Stakes Poker” is set to begin airing in the summer.

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